How To Get A Job In These Times



Got this in an email. Posted it on YouTube!

March 16, 2009 · Ajit · No Comments
Posted in: Humor, via email

Usage of ‘Allah’ Banned For Non Muslims

See this

Action can be taken against non-Muslim publications in 10 Malaysian states if they use four words related to Islam, including ‘Allah’.

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A ‘fatwa’ had been issued to prohibit non-Muslim publications from using the words ‘Allah’, ‘Kaabah’, ‘Solat’ and ‘Baitullah’ in their reading materials.

Looks like someone in Malayasia has read this :)

March 5, 2009 · Ajit · No Comments
Posted in: idiocy

Recession Geeta Sandesh

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March 4, 2009 · Ajit · 96 Comments
Posted in: via email

Know Your Customer

A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment.

A friend asked, “Why weren’t you successful with the Arabs?”

The salesman explained, “When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I would make a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn’t know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through three posters…

knowyourcust

First poster- Aman lying in the hot desert sand…totally exhausted and fainting.

Second poster – man is drinking our Cola.

Third poster- Our man is now totally refreshed.

Then these posters were pasted all over the place

“That should have worked,” said the friend.

The salesman replied “I also didn’t realize that Arabs go from right to left”

February 24, 2009 · Ajit · One Comment
Posted in: Funny Stuff, Humor, Humour, Jokes, Jokes and Humor, via email

Slumdog – The Grand Finale!!!

When I watched Slumdog Millionaire, I didn’t think it was an extraordinary movie but what I did like about the movie was its originality, the story-telling and beautiful direction.

SM won 8 Academy Awards on the 81st Academy Awards ceremony (The Oscars). It was actually wonderful to see the accolades received by the movie on different counts.

It is amazing the kind of reactions this movie has generated. One of my favorite bloggers did not like the movie. I understand his reasoning but hey it is a movie and there are many like that out there. Yes some of the scenes were very graphic (Unnecessarily If I may add).

After all it is a movie, some may like it and some may not, but the whole Oscar sweep and the Golden Globe and other awards have given a stage to the Indian artists like no other. It has created history for India; A.R Rahman bags 2 Oscars, Frieda Pinto on stage announcing an award, Indian artists performing on stage in one of the biggest entertainment events in the world. Where else has this happened?

I know many of you may say that the Oscars are heavily biased and the awards is a western thing and so on. So what if you think it is a western thing? Why is it a bad thing if ANYBODY (read west) appreciates your work.? So what if the bias in the Oscars bias was in your favor this time?

This is a historical moment for Indian artists and  some are busy figuring out who was the first to get on stage when the Oscars were announced for the best film.

I say, sit back, enjoy and savor the moment.

February 23, 2009 · Ajit · One Comment
Tags: , ,  · Posted in: Movies, Oscars

What A Rant!!!

Awesome Rant

Link via Atanu Dey

I put myself through hell. I make my body do things nature never really intended us to endure. All world-class athletes do. We do it because you love to watch us push ourselves as far as we can possibly go. Some of us get hurt. Sometimes permanently. You’re watching the Super Bowl tonight. You’re watching 300 pound men smash each while running at full speed, in full pads. You know what the average life expectancy of an NFL player is? Fifty-five. That’s about 20 years shorter than your average non-NFL player. Yet you watch. And cheer. And you jump up spill your beer when a linebacker lays out a wide receiver on a crossing route across the middle. The harder he gets hit, the louder and more enthusiastically you scream.

*****

Tell you what. I’ll make you a deal. I’ll apologize for smoking pot when every politician who ever did drugs and then voted to uphold or strengthen the drug laws marches his ass off to the nearest federal prison to serve out the sentence he wants to impose on everyone else for committing the same crimes he committed. I’ll apologize when the sons, daughters, and nephews of powerful politicians who get caught possessing or dealing drugs in the frat house or prep school get the same treatment as the no-name, probably black kid caught on the corner or the front stoop doing the same thing.

Until then, I for one will have none of it. I smoked pot. I liked it. I’ll probably do it again. I refuse to apologize for it, because by apologizing I help perpetuate this stupid lie, this idea that what someone puts into his own body on his own time is any of the government’s damned business. Or any of yours. I’m not going to bend over and allow myself to be propaganda for this wasteful, ridiculous, immoral war.

Go ahead and tear me down if you like. But let’s see you rationalize in your next lame ONDCP commercial how the greatest motherfucking swimmer the world has ever seen . . . is also a proud pot smoker.

February 23, 2009 · Ajit · 2 Comments
Tags: ,  · Posted in: Rant

Online Tourist Queries

Q:   Does it ever get windy in India ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A:      We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q:    Will I be able to see elephants in the street? ( USA )

A:      Depends how much you’ve been drinking.

Q:      I want to walk from Delhi to Goa – can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden )

A:      Sure, it’s only three thousand kms, take lots of water.

Q:      Is it safe to run around in the bushes in India ?   ( Sweden )

A:      So it’s true what they say about Swedes.

Q:     Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in India ? Can you send me a list of them in Delhi , Chennai, Calcutta and Bangalore ? ( UK )

A:      What did your last slave die of?

Q:     Can you give me some information about hippo racing in India ?  ( USA )

A:      A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe . In-di-a is that big triangle in  the middle of the Pacific & Indian Ocean which does not.. oh forget it. …… Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Goa .  Come naked.

Q:     Which direction is North in India ? ( USA )

A:      Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we’ll send the rest of the directions.

Q:     Can I bring cutlery into India ? (  UK )

A:      Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q:       Can you send me the Indiana Pacers matches schedule? ( France )

A:       Indiana is a state in the Unites States of…oh forget it.  Sure, the Indiana Pacers matches are played every Tuesday  night in Goa , straight after the hippo races.  Come naked.

Q:      Can I wear high heels in India ? ( UK )

A:      You’re a British politician, right?

Q:     Are there supermarkets in Bangalore , and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )

A:      No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q:    Please send a list of all doctors in India who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A:      Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.  All Indian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make  good pets.

Q:     Do you have perfume in India ? ( France )

A:      No, WE don’t stink.

Q:      I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth.  Can you tell me where I can sell it in India ?  ( USA )

A:      Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q:      Do you celebrate Christmas in India ? ( France )

A:      Only at Christmas.

Q:     Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )

A:      Yes, but you’ll have to learn it first

Q:     Can I see Taj Mahal anytime? ( Italy )

A:      As long as you are not blind, you can see it anytime.

Q:     Do you have Toilet paper? ( USA )

A:      No, we use sand paper. (we have different grades)

February 19, 2009 · Ajit · No Comments
Posted in: Funny Stuff, Humor, Humour, Jokes, Jokes and Humor, via email

Economics 2008

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February 13, 2009 · Ajit · 2 Comments
Posted in: Funny Stuff, Humor, Humour, Jokes, Jokes and Humor, via email

Liquidity – New Definition

newliquiditydefn

February 13, 2009 · Ajit · No Comments
Posted in: Funny Stuff, Humor, Humour, via email

Walk And Charge

Few students of my alma-mater have come with an innovative idea to charge electronics gadget. And that idea is very simple and yet powerful.

All charged up: L-R Shachi Pande, Rushikesh Pande, Isha Nag, Tejas Narsimhan , Aditya Nanavaty and Sarvesh Patil
Now your regular 20-minute morning walk can also help in recharging your cellphone battery. Don’t miss a step. It’s true! A team of six students from College of Engineering, Pune (COEP) has made this possible for those who are always on the run.

Isha Nag, Aditya Nanavaty, Rushikesh Pande, Shachi Pande (all third-year production engineering students) and Sarvesh Patil, Tejas Narasimhan (second year students from the same stream) teamed up for the venture.

The portable walk-in charger that they have made works on energy produced while you walk and within 20 minutes your cellphone battery could get fully charged.

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HOW DOES IT WORK?

1.
Dynamo: Captures the rhythmic movement of both legs and turns it into a rotary motion
2.
Retractable string: Can be pulled out from the device to connect both legs
3.
Circuit: Attached to a rechargable battery that gets charged when you walk

Charge-on!

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A single pencil cell costs about Rs. 7. A walk ‘n’ charge device would generate as much energy as a AA battery in 21 minutes. If it is used for one hour daily, it would recover its cost in less than 12 days
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A 20 minute walk charges your cell phone for a day’s usage.
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It can fit in your pocket
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Not only mobile but could be used to charge other electronic devices such as i-pods, PMPs, GPS devices, Digital cameras
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The spring has a guarantee of eight years!

This device got them the first prize and got them the first prize. Now the students have applied patent for it. I think this is wonderful. Congratulations to all involved and best of luck.

February 13, 2009 · Ajit · 2 Comments
Tags: , , ,  · Posted in: Education, Innovation